It happened. It finally happened. And it only took three kids for me to get here. I have officially decided that I do not care what "the rules" are regarding parenting decisions. or general baby care. Let me tell you what I do not care about.
1) Drop side cribs - I have two of them. All three children have survived them. If you put the crib together correctly, nothing bad will happen.
2) Crib bumpers - I use them. All three children have managed to not strangle themselves or suffocate or whatever dangerous things are supposed to happen if you dare to use them. The only time I tried taking them off, whichever baby it was spent all night waking himself up rolling around, banging his head on the wooden railings and getting feet stuck between the slats. I really prefer to sleep than play Crib Monitor.
3) Scheduled feedings - The AAP actually has an official standing on parent-directed feeding (aka Babywise). Again, this is directed to people who refuse to feed their babies except on the rigid schedule that they have decided on. I have always paid attention to my babies' hunger cues, based a routine off of what he was doing already, and if they seemed hungry outside of the routine, I just fed them. Common sense.
4) Solids. Apparently, you're now supposed to not give the baby a drop of anything except breastmilk (or formula if you're bottlefeeding) until 6 months (as opposed to 4-6 months which was the recommendation until I had this baby). Because I hate doing solids, and it takes so darn long, I SWORE I wasn't going to do it until 6 months anyway. I lied.
5) Medicine recommendations. Eh. I'm going to do what I need to do to make my sick babies comfortable. Don't use Vicks Baby Rub on a baby under 3 months? Broke that one. Don't give cough/cold medicine to a child under 4-6 years old? Broke that one too.
6) Developmental milestones. I'm only about half worried about this. Obviously, if my kids weren't able to hold their heads up, or babble or make eye contact or do MAJOR things, I would be concerned. But I've now had one kid crawl at 6 months, walk at 9 months and one who crawled at 9 months and walked at almost 14 months. Kids have their own timeline and most of the time they will figure stuff out on their own.
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7) Bathing my kids. Oh yes, I am just really a slacker about this one. My pediatrician likes to tell me how all six of his children got a nightly bath as part of their bedtime routine. Right...I'm lucky if my kids get bathed once a week. I am honestly not sure when Isaac's last bath was. And really...it's not like he's rolling around in the dirt at 5 months old.
8) "Back to sleep". All the reports of SIDS babies make you terrified for your baby to sleep on his belly. I actually broke the rules with my first baby, if you'll believe that. Ethan hated being swaddled and would constantly startle himself awake, so we tried putting him on his belly. Genius. Worked like a charm. Isaac (third kid) has been sleeping on his belly by choice since he was about 4 months old as well. The interesting thing is that my earliest walker was the one who slept on his belly. Correlation? Who knows.
9) Presents. Sorry, Isaac, but you are so totally getting toys re-gifted from the upstairs closet. You will never know the difference. You will love those toys just as much as if they were brand new.
And finally...
10) I don't know how to word this one, but basically, I don't care who holds him anymore. By this, I mean, I used to freak out if he was being passed around from person to person (maybe not on the outside because I didn't want to make anyone uncomfortable) but I just wanted to protect him from germs and thought it would upset babies to be passed around. Now, honestly, you may hold him. Because that means that I get a break. Besides...he's so cute. How could I stop anyone from wanting him? Sharing with: No Ordinary Blog Hop,
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Beautifully said girl! We (women) kill ourselves trying to follow "The rules". Breaking the rules helps us to remain sane! All of the rules don't pertain to every family! I really enjoyed reading this, and will pass it on to a friend who has been going crazy over this very topic!
ReplyDeleteI had 4 that walked at 10 mo and one 12 months - the latest walker was the one who slept on his back due to the new "rules." One-size fits all rules do not fit real life! Cheering you on in your rule breaking!!!
ReplyDeleteWow, I could have written this post (and most of your others! I'm so glad I stumbled onto your blog). Thanks for helping me not feel so bad about forgetting when it last was I gave the baby a bath... if it wasn't for church each week I'd probably forget with the bigger kids too :P.
ReplyDeleteI have two more things to add to your list:
1) Back to sleep. When I had my first child I was horrified to hear that people would not follow this - didn't they read all the posters?? Then we did the research ourselves and found out it wasn't all that compelling. Our fourth baby is a very happy tummy sleeper (and so was our third).
2) Breast is best. Breast is best only if it works for you. With baby #3 I wore myself out trying to make it work. What I got was a very hungry, very miserable baby who cried for hours and refused to nurse. We were all happier when he went on formula at 3 1/2 months, but I still felt the need to explain myself to everyone who saw me bottle feeding my infant. Fast forward to #4, who is 3 1/2 months old now and has never taken a bottle or had a single problem with nursing. For now, breast is best. And if the day comes when it's not, I refuse to feel guilty about it!
Anna
Oh, yes, I definitely should have added those two! My first slept on his belly at 3 months because he kept waking himself up on his back and my 5 month now sleeps on his belly too. And while I nursed the first kid for 7 1/2 months, I gave up at 9 weeks with my second because we were both crying through every feeding. Definitely the best thing for us. Thanks for adding these!
ReplyDeleteThat's funny because my early walker also slept on his belly...while my late walker slept on his back. I should have added the belly sleeping thing to the list!
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